Thoughts while driving

The reason people love superhero movies are because they are always conflicted. Fighting every day crimes but most of the time fighting within themselves. Either the pain of the fallen or the pain of your choices. It is hard to heal when your mind is always on someone or something else. That is why people overworked themselves or bury themselves with plans. The escape has to be worth it because at the end of the night when it is all quiet and you try to decompress, your mind reminds you what is real. This is why sometimes I can't sleep. Reflecting on what is real and what is fake. Those are my common dilemmas. The choices we sit with and the regrets I overthink about. But what do you do when you are tired? Tired of hurting people with your choices. We are taught to fight it. That is why in a dispute with someone the most disrespectful comment usually wins. “Don’t talk to me”, “I regret meeting you”, “Hope you disappear”. All hurtful but some words just pierce your heart differently. Someone told me “Rob You are Love”. I sat there confused. I asked them what they meant and they said “i never met a person who has been hurt so much and been betrayed but still had room in their heart to love”. I have been thinking about this so much lately. But lately I've been out of my character. Just reflecting. Believe me i am no angel. Lately i have been inconsiderate and selfish. This is not a self pity post. My decisions have led me to lose significant things. I just hope they are not beyond repair. But I guess that’s what life is about…letting go. If it comes back, treasure it. Now if it doesn’t. Can we live with the pain. I wish i didn’t care. Sometimes I envy the people who can just move on and not think of anything. Not feel anything. Not to miss any memory. I know we can’t satisfy everyone or every need. All we can do is take accountability. Guess that is part of the journey. Part of trying to get to your destination. I just hope we can get there safely.

“You’re sure to lose your mind if you never follow your heart”

Peace & Love

Songs that inspired me to rant while driving: Dom Kennedy “5.0 conversations”, Fabolous ft Trey Songs “Slow Down”, Fabolous “Riesling Rolling Papers”

Thanks to Veronica and Lito for the conversations